Tatsuya Ishida - notes from THE RESISTANCE

"Back when I was a kid I could never figure out why my stomach hurt, not realizing that it was the jalapeno cheese nachos I had the day before. My attention span just wasn't developed enough to put those two things together. The peppers didn't even figure into my thinking--I mean, geez, it was yesterday, that's like forever ago, and as far as I knew the stomach ache was a brand new, completely separate development, a mysterious phenomenon that sprang spontaneously into being. It had the character of divine intervention, the pain taking on epic proportions, without beginning or end, and accordingly I'd get all moral about it. I thought I was being punished by some higher power for being bad. I'd be on the toilet doubled over in agony, apologizing to God for some unidentified transgression. I'd be there blubbering to myself, 'Sorry, I won't do it again. Whatever it was I'm so sorry...' Now, decades later, having blossomed into a mature and magnificent powerhouse of rationality, when I get stomach aches, I'm like Sherlock Holmes, man. I break the shit down. What did I eat? Was it those falafels? Was the meat bad? Am I allergic to meat? Did the waiter spit in my food? Was he a terrorist unleashing a biological attack on my person? I'm like those forensic fuckers on CSI. Very methodical. Very analytical. Shit, now when I have religious experiences I immediately retrace my steps, try to track down what series of events led me to this euphoric spiritual illumination. I investigate, gather information, and hypothesize, in a cool and detached manner. It was probably those blueberry waffles. They were heavenly."